I used to think being a good leader meant always having the answers. Decisive. Clear. Capable. The kind of person people look to when things get messy.
And for a long time, I was much more comfortable saying “I was wrong” than saying “I don’t know” or “I need help.”
Admitting I was wrong felt like closing a chapter: we tried something, it didn’t work, we learned, we move on.But saying “I don’t know” or “I need help” felt like opening a door to doubt — in myself, in others’ perception of me, in whether I was “enough.”
Over the years, I’ve learned that those two phrases — the ones that caught in my throat — were the ones that most often built trust, strengthened teams, and made me a better human outside of work too.
Here’s why:
🔹 “I don’t know.” In business, it signals curiosity and a willingness to learn rather than bluffing through uncertainty. In life, it opens space for real conversations instead of defensive posturing. I’ve found that saying it doesn’t diminish credibility — it often enhances it.
🔹 “I need help.” This one can feel risky because it means admitting you can’t do it all. But it’s an invitation for collaboration. It makes others feel valued, and it shows you value the outcome more than the optics. In personal relationships, it’s often the bridge to deeper connection.
🔹 “I was wrong.” Acknowledging mistakes keeps you humble and human. I was always okay with this one, maybe because it felt finite: I can course-correct. But paired with the first two phrases, it becomes part of an even bigger practice — one that prioritizes learning over ego.
The upside of always appearing strong and decisive is obvious: it inspires confidence. But the downside is that it can create distance — between you and your team, and even between you and yourself.
I’m still learning to reach for those harder phrases first, but when I do, the results — in both business and life — have been worth it.
